Ever wonder why we make such a big deal about resolutions when so many people either don't make them (less than 40%) or if they do, only about 8% actually happen? Wishful thinking maybe? Or possibly, "Where did I hide that magic wand anyway?"
So if they don't work, how about for starters we just throw out the whole idea of resolutions. Let go of the practice entirely. Decide that this year you just won't be joining that crowd.
"But what is the alternative?", you may ask. Do we just give up, hang our heads, and never get what we want or need? That seems as unworkable as a resolution.
My answer is to, instead, just set a straight up reasonable goal or intention with no pressure, no fanfare, no guarantees. Don't make any unreasonable promises either. And definitely don't run out and buy the first gadget, expensive software, or gym membership to incent you to actually do it.
Unless you are the type who needs your feet put to the fire or someone chasing you with a hot poker to ensure you get them done, then by all means hire someone to do that for (or with) you. Barring that, there is no better way to get what you want or need than to just take one small step towards it.
No big deal made of it. No huge announcement.
Still not feeling the love? Then how about this approach, one that I developed which combines a few tools I've used in the past along with a new, fun one I picked up this year.
Here goes... the simple, easy plan...
First, get a piece of paper or two (a journal if you prefer) and write down as many WINS and successes from last year you can possibly remember. Pull out last year's calendar to help remind you. Ask someone who knows you well to help fill it in even more. This is your time to pat yourself on the back and remind yourself of your successes. This is not the time to berate yourself for so little accomplished or to rag on yourself for not getting more done. Pats on the back only please!
Second, next to each win, ask yourself, "What did I learn or glean from this win or success?" Write that down next to the win. No belittling allowed here. There was a reason you accomplished it, no matter how small you deem it. What was the outcome? How did it make you feel?
Third, scan your list of what you learned from each win or success. What do they have in common? Do you see a trend or commonality? If so, write that down.
Fourth, use that commonality in setting your new goal or intention. One goal or intention. Not a huge list (unless you love lists and they motivate you), just one, simple, straight forward intention.
And finally, say goodbye to the old year. Now that you've gleaned from it what you need, let it go, send it on its way with a loving "bye, bye!" Make a celebration or ritual of it, a goodbye party if you wish, or light a candle and say a prayer but do say goodbye in an intentional, clear way.
No hanging onto the past. Now it's time to take your first baby step.
No guilt please. Say goodbye to that too. And remember, that failure is part of the process. Every successful endeavour has a few missteps or goof ups. Use those for your course correction and step once again onto your path to your accomplishment.
No step is too small. No accomplishment is unimportant.
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