Its Your Choice

How To Motivate Yourself To Reach Your Goals

Having to do something you don't want to do isn't hard to imagine. We run into it almost every day.

It usually involves change, time, attitude and choice, but not necessarily in that order. There are some things we are faced with that bring out the two-year-old in us as we tantrum and say "no" both verbally and behaviourally. The doctor says we can't eat sweets, so we buy a big bag of Snickers. The workplace says we can't smoke, so we hatch all sorts of devious plans to do it anyway. We need to lose weight, so we skip anything that looks healthy or involves movement. It's all a big fat NO!

None of this changes the fact we need to do something different, new, better, life-saving and helpful for ourselves.

So, as an exercise, choose something you need to do. Now, let's ease into how to do it. There's no need to go whole hog and overwhelm yourself with dramatic and over-ambitious ideas right off the bat. It works best to look at other times you've made a successful change. Recall how you did it and remember the reward that came with your effort. Once you remember something you've done, you know that you truly can make wise decisions and you can continue to make them. Chances are, if something has come to mind, you did something to make it happen. The good news is that you can do it again, even better, quicker, easier.

I recommend writing your answers to these few questions:

Did you plan for success or did it "just happen?"

What inspires you to make change? Or Who?

How can you keep your focus on achieving or doing something to bring about change?

What's a reasonable time for this to happen? For example, don't plan to write a book in a weekend, no matter what those programs advertise.

If you had to defer one part of your plan this week, how would you make sure you pick back up and stay on course next week?

Do you prefer working days at a time? An hour at a time? What time of day is better for you to devote to achieving your goal?

If you were to evaluate yourself, can you see any patterns you choose that either determine your success or determine your failure?

Your goals are unique to you and the way you choose to succeed at succeeding or succeed at failing are unique to you. These questions will help you look deeply into your patterns of behavior and pick the parts that are more likely to work for your success. You can determine what different choices you can apply this time, based on what you know about yourself, to enjoy the process and achieve a good outcome.

Tips:

Create a plan for yourself. Write a daily plan that includes action steps. At the end of the week, you can see all the positive steps you've taken. If they are small steps, they are still positive. Don't discount them. Look at your week. Were there days you reverted or wanted to revert back to "the way I've always done it?"

If there were times you felt yourself slipping back into old habits or resisting change, make a list of things you can do if this happens again.

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It's Not Over Till You Win

In Pursuit of Purpose

    

What is my purpose?" Everybody has one - a reason they were created. There is some role to fulfil, some part to play, some reason for our existence, right? I've heard purpose described, quite simply, if you see something that needs to be done, it is your purpose to do it. Another approach was find out what you are passionate about and you'll find your purpose. Maybe it's that simple, but something inside says there's got to be more.

When I think of Purpose, I think of what gives meaning to our lives. It keeps us from the futility of aimless Doing with nothing more to show but unfulfilled lives. We might find our lives tolerable. In fact, like tattered, gapping, runover sneakers, our lives may be oh so comfortable yet falling apart.
My life coach encouraged me to use some tools to explore my purpose even more deeply. I was given an exercise that involved first identifying my Values, Motivations and Strengths. This knowledge, in turn, would reveal Meaning, Spark and Contribution. All roads were to ultimately lead to Individual Awareness. I must admit, I still couldn't put all the pieces together BUT I gained understanding that let me know I was closer to Purpose than I had ever been before.
PUT YOURSELF FIRST. This was my first pearl of wisdom. It is not enough to know who you are, but you must honor who you are. Heretofore, I had exerted so much energy in knowing myself, but kept placing myself in compromising situations. I grossly neglected taking care of that self.
You might say, "well, that sounds good but how do you actually put yourself first?" I'm glad you asked. First, take a long look at where your time and energy are going. How much of that time is other-directed? How much of that time is for you?
Take paper and pencil and list energizers on one side and drainers on the other. Then prioritize the two lists based on the intensity. Say, you list "taking work home" as a drainer. How much of a drain is it? Is it a minor annoyance or does it leave you so tired that you have no energy for anything or anybody else? Our lives are like bank accounts. You can only take out what has been deposited else the account is overdrawn. Nothing else can go out until something is put in.

Another way of putting yourself first is to take a typical day. Carve out some time for yourself. Doesn't have to be major but it must be meaningful. I suggest scheduling me time just as you schedule lunch or other appointments. For me, it was going outdoors: leaving the confines of the indoors and embracing the expanded vantage point of nature.
YOUR PURPOSE KNOWS WHO YOU ARE. This was profound. It took the toil out of trying to find out my purpose. It removed the anxiety of trying to find something that seemed to elude me. When you act in accordance with who you are, purpose recognizes you. You invite purpose to present you with opportunities to usher you into a better life. I've heard countless success stories of people who took a risk on what they believed or wanted for their lives. Despite doubters and haters, they heard something that they couldn't explain tell them they had to go for it. And they did. When they stood up, Purpose came running.
PURPOSE IS NOT ONLY THE DESTINATION BUT IT IS THE JOURNEY. Purpose is the driving force, the energy that drives us to its fulfillment. Purpose takes coincidences and turns them into opportunities. Purpose takes discontent and leaves bread crumbs for you to follow that bring you to a higher consciousness. Purpose takes unpleasant experiences and brings you to a place of meaning and a deeper understanding of who you are and how you fit in the larger picture. Purpose exposes the mediocre and inspires excellence. Purpose is a relentless agitator, oft challenging where we are and beckoning us to where we're suppose to be. Purpose does not require facts, it simply knows. Purpose is never ever wrong. So, if you are in pursuit of purpose, let me give you some liberating news. Purpose is in pursuit of you.